Healing the Witch Wound

Some use their powers for darkness; some use them for light. This great awakening is bringing us back to balance. What is your intention?

This blog post has been sitting in my drafts for almost two weeks now. Maybe I just didn't have everything I needed to know before finishing and posting it?

People will say things like Mercury retrograde isn't real, but that closed off perspective does not align with what my experience has been like over the last several weeks. I believe if something exists, it has an effect on everything that exists even if it can't be perceived. We are the microcosm of the macrocosm—individual little universes existing within a larger one. To believe the cosmos has no impact upon our lives when we are a part of the universe made up of the cosmos ourselves is ignorant in my opinion.

Retrograde hit me out of nowhere when I had felt so much forward momentum leading up to it.

My peer support class arrived, and I realized by day three (the day before retrograde began) following through with the certification would limit me from the ways I want to connect and communicate with others. I should have known the hiccup would arrive after an aligned encounter with someone months earlier as I waited for the class to begin provided a channeled message about, "it's almost as if the things that are the most beneficial can be done without a certificate or degree."

I am still grateful I had the opportunity to complete the training. I gained a lot from the class that helped polish some skills and make some changes to my idea. But it was also draining. For weeks, I have felt anxious, confused, unmotivated, and feeling as if I am stuck in a place I will never come out of.

How do I move forward when everything I try feels like a dead end? What do I do when my dreams feel like they aren't going anywhere even with time and effort?

One night, I sat down to sort out some lucky black-eyed peas to soak. I began thinking about my mom as I scanned the pan for any pieces that needed to be removed. The memories came flooding back. As a kid, I remember her sorting beans weekly as she watched episodes of her favorite shows, Days of Our Lives and Charmed.

Sometimes in life you have to sort things out and decide what you want to keep for nourishment and what you want to leave behind.

I have thought a lot about the neglect of my childhood over the years. Over the last two years of deeper healing within myself, I have come to understand my mother better as I have understood myself more. I always said I didn't want to be like my mother, but I have learned I am like her in many ways both good and bad.

I have thought a lot about how these fantasy worlds were her own way of escaping trauma she likely wasn't even aware of being trauma just as I wasn't fully aware after years of normalizing dysfunction. I had many ways of escaping, one of which included television, just like her. The drama on TV was a distraction from the drama we tolerated in our own lives that existed inside and outside of us.

I find it particularly interesting how much she loved Charmed, a show about women discovering they are powerful witches destined to use their powers to protect the world from evil. Growing up in a devout Christian family, witchcraft is inherently evil. Yet, my mother was drawn to many things regularly demonized by the Christian community.

Perhaps she was even the reason I loved Harry Potter so much? He was the reject that discovered how magical and valuable he was because he was different. I felt like Harry Potter and dreamed my reality could shift like his one day.

I remember the smell of incense permeating from my mom's bedroom every day when I was a little girl. I loved to watch the smoke dance in ribbons as the sticks burned on a wooden tray atop her white oak dresser with a triple mirror—the same dresser in my bedroom today. Her room was a deep purple that had a mystical energy to it. It was powerful and said, "I am royalty," but with a soft, feminine touch of dust-colored roses circling the room in a wallpaper border.

My mom with Katie (my lady), an abused rescue she saved.

She felt connected to nature. Even once the cows were gone, our country home still resembled a farm as she helped me raise chickens, ducks, rabbits, dogs, and cats. We even bottle-fed baby goats and nursed them back to health when one of her friend's needed help after coyotes injured members of the herd.

It wasn't just animals, though. She loved to work outside in the sun. She did landscaping work, running her own business—or at least being a business partner—at several points throughout her life. We had a garden at home, too. She loved to cook homemade meals with homegrown vegetables. She wasn't home much as I got older, but I do remember her frequently in the kitchen when I was in elementary school.

My mom was the "K" in "BF & K Services."

She went all out for Halloween parties when my older sister was a teenager. I even distinctly remember having a lot of the 90's witch aesthetic decor with the sun and moon in our house. She loved to stargaze. Perhaps in her soul she felt the same things I feel when looking up at those twinkling lights set against a dark sky? Home is in the stars somewhere.

Reflecting on my upbringing and my own spiritual self-discovery, I am sad my mom never got to explore her true spiritual connection due to the religious indoctrination. She knew in her heart as it surfaced in small rituals and her hobbies, but she never discovered it.

She was likely afraid to lose her family if she explored that side of herself any deeper. Like many victims of narcissism, she learned to hold her tongue and people please, performing out of fear under the illusion of love. She wore many faces depending on whose presence she was in. She learned to hide in the same ways I often did. To realize the divine feminine magic within her, she would have been demonized more than she already was for failing to meet the expectations set for her. Just as I have been. Just as many other powerful women have been. 

There is still a lot of misinformation and misunderstanding, but I am grateful to live in a time where I can exist without being burned, drowned, or hung for knowing who I am spiritually. 

The Salem Witch Trials ended 333 years ago, which in the grand scheme of things is the blink of an eye. This treatment had been taking place for centuries under the influence of Abrahamic religion, though. 

Recently, I have been seeing a rise in demonization of spiritual paths that are not institutionalized as more people seem to be exploring consciousness and reconnecting to our ancient heart songs. Given the way people are still systematically murdered for their beliefs (Palestine for example), it is concerning, but I like to maintain faith that love wins out in the end.

The only persecution I have experienced since reconnecting to my spirituality has been in the form of insults and online harassment. The most recent was mild and rather laughable. I was called a dumb gypsy for speaking about my discontent with our current earthly systems. It was intended as an insult, but for me, it was a compliment that confirmed things I know in my heart.

What a beautiful way to live life—a free sovereign spirit that does not care about the perception of society. Not settling for a life someone else tells you is the path you are meant to walk but instead forging your own path, flowing with life. A life of adventure and curiosity over convenience and monotony. My soul has felt called to a nomadic life where I trust in the divine universe for some time now. I know it is something I have done in past lives, but I have been too afraid to take the leap. Fears of financial security and safety are my biggest blockages.

A random adventure I took in North Carolina.

Shortly after this exchange, I was at the gym working out my frustrations of how ignorant some people can be rather than continuing to argue with them about things they clearly have no interest in trying to understand. I looked up at the row of TVs just in time to catch three of them synchronizing with a message I knew was meant for me.

TV one was a commercial with a psychic reader holding tarot cards with a neon PSYCHIC sign behind her. She looked like the stereotypes people place upon gypsy people, reminding me of the man that attempted to insult me for having the audacity to criticize a corrupt world.

TV two was another commercial that I could not tell you what it was for. All I know is I saw the words "miracles happen" across the screen.

TV three was clearly some kind of commercial for an accidental injury lawyer. In big letters across a background in my own auspicious color, red, it said, "YOU DESERVE TO GET PAID."

Isn't it fascinating how the universe speaks when you become present enough to fully observe the patterns and codes written within the simulation?

I have been eating myself alive with worry about how I could potentially support myself as I travel or get anyone to want to share their life and spiritual awakening stories with me for my podcast when the answer has always been right in front of me. I have been denying parts of myself and guidance out of feelings of inadequacy and fear of what other people that do not understand me might think about me. I have had success before, so why do I doubt my own abilities and energy?

Why have I not trusted or believed in myself?

I was gifted a beautiful deck as I made the decision to finally learn after years of interest. The woman that designed the deck not only provided me a deck free of charge, but she gave me an affiliate link knowing I was a beginner. The universe has supported my path and practice from the beginning.

I have since read cards for donations at festivals, often offering my time and energy free of charge to help others. I do encourage others to work with cards on their own if it is a modality that interests them because the cards are not meant to tell you anything you don't already have the answers for within you. No one knows your inner world better than yourself.

It isn't about the money to me, but am I not worthy of having positive energy flowing back into my life to help me build my dreams? We are all deserving of having our time and energy compensated so that we may create the life that nourishes our soul. We can't pour from an empty cup. Success is built collectively through mutual support, not competition, comparison, jealousy, or judgment.

I will include a link to this deck at the end of this blog.

I have committed to getting back into my cards. They are a tool that helped me connect deeper with myself and illuminate things with my subconscious I couldn't see before. They helped me learned how observe myself and be more honest with myself. They have helped me through grief and brought me joy. It is my intention I can help others discover their own power within using the tools that make my inner child happy to play with.

Things like cards, crystals, herbs, spells, candles, incense, plant medicines, and more are not demonic. Just as anything else in life, it is about the intention and energy you put into it, and how you utilize the tools. The cards just read energy. They don't tell you what you want to hear, and that makes many people uncomfortable. People that wear masks to protect their ego don't like to be seen beneath the faces they put on. Maybe that's why society is so quick to assume it's evil? The truth isn't always easy.

I know these tools do not give me power. My power comes from the divine source existing within me. These are just my chosen outlets to help me express my natural gifts, and there is nothing wrong with that. We are each on our own spiritual paths designed uniquely for each of us by Spirit. My connection is personal between myself and Source, not another human being that does not know who I Am on a spiritual level.

The same goes for you, dear reader.

Don't let another person tell you who you are or what path you are meant to walk. They didn't create you. They don't live your reality. They don't possess your soul. You have the power over your own destiny.

I am grateful to work with the elements, plants, animals, and stars. I am grateful for the tools provided for me to help in my expression. I am grateful for the power of my voice, a divine instrument constructed with a resonance unique to me to reach others. I am grateful for the gift of words that flow through my fingertips.

Just a few of my favorite things.

Most of all, I am grateful for the sacred fire burning inside of me and the divine blueprint designed just for me.

My mom didn't discover her own spiritual path while she was here, but what she did do was open the door for my own awakening. Through her death, my spirit is finally alive. Every step I take is as much of her legacy as it is mine. I know she is in the stars above me, shining down on me with the rest of the ancestors.

I love you Momma. 

Your guidance beyond the physical has been the greatest teacher I could have ever asked for. Your sacrifice gave me the power to save myself.

Karen, a poem

I wish I could hug you

or just hear your voice.

In your absence, life goes on.

I haven't any other choice.

We speak in my dreams.

In our own secret language,

every day you show me signs you're still near.

I miss you so much Momma.

I wish you were still here.

Though you are physically gone,

your infinite soul survives.

Til we meet again one day,

these are just the days of our lives.

The energy of Rose Quartz can aid in healing emotional wounds and trauma.

If you would like to purchase a Tridevia Goddess Tarot Deck, click here and be sure to use code ElectricHoneypot at checkout for additional savings!

If you would like to purchase a pre-recorded personal reading or schedule a private reading with me, please fill out the contact form on the main website or email me directly at BeeConnected@electrichoneypotproject.com

Remember to be curious, question everything.

Most of all, stay sweet honeybee.

Sting when it counts.

—Autumn Brooke, Electric Honeypot 💜🐝♾️

Copyright © 2025 [Autumn Brooke, Electric Honeypot Project]. All Rights Reserved.